Problems with dad, need help

[Fathead]

guys, i need some serious personal help right now. I was just at the shop, with my dad, arguing like usual, and i finally just said the keys are in it, take it, bye, and i walked about a mile to my moms house(they are divorced). Im tired of all his s***. What i mean by that is he gets pissed over the little things, and im just tired of it. Like today, he stoped by a shop i was gonna have check my A/F ratio, and timing, because its been acting like its been flooding, and he found out, and he got pissed. Imagine that, im taking my car to someone who might help, although ive been mentioning it to him for the past month. Then i dont go to help him out at the shop because i hate being around him when hes pissed(everyday). Like when i try to talk something out, the first thing ill say is \"let me finish what im saying\" i say like 3 words and he interupts, i mean that in the f*** is soo hard about waiting for me to finish, respect me that much at least. Also, ill work for him, and like i worked 40 hrs lately, and he says ill pay you ill pay you when im working, but when i ask for the money, he gets pissed, what the h*** is up with that. Im just fed up with this crap, having to dread goin over to his house(like 3 miles, i go back and fourth between moms and dads everyday) because we always argue, yet my mom and i have a great relationship. I just wanna get my rims, spacers, system, and everything that I HAVE PAID FOR off my truck, getmy wakeboard and other things at his hosue i have paid for, and say have a nice life, sorry it turned out this way. Its horrible i know, but i dont see anything else. I would definately go to counseling, but he wouldnt want to, and even if he did, he wouldnt wanna pay for it. SO please, give me some insight, i need it really bad. And thanks for being here for me guys. I could go on for hours, but im sure you dont have that much time.

[mango86]

holler back at me, I\'m a good listener.have 4 young men myself. ages-20, 19, 18, 17.

[IceQueen]

keep it strong get your stuff move in with your mom and try and work things out with your dad from a distance maybe not havin you around so much will make him rethink his issues either way *Hugz*

[my454s10]

most usally this is\'t the place for this...but hey i really feel for you.....i never had my real dad there for me....mom and he divorced when i was 2...but i have have my step dad for me.....i tried to be around my real dad but he is about the biggest a-s-s you have ever sen or heard....he has a huge drug problem.....i seen him sell 50,000$$$ in snap on tools for a high...i seen him sell a 25,000 turbo supra for a high.....he has sold 5 machine shops for a high....and when you try to talk to him about it ...he blow\'s up and a fight starts....sorry to hear about you ...

[eurekarobert]

Hang tight and fight through the battle. Giving up is no way to resolve it. It might seem the best but....it never works. Having your parents live so close should be an advantage for you. Go to Moms when he is acting up. Does HE own the truck or do you? I believe by removing your personal belongings from his house will only upset him more. Try to figure out why he is always pissed off. Did he have a bad father? Being a parent is not easy. WE learn from our parents on to and not to be parents. My advice to you is to remain cool and listen tell he is completely done and then ask questions. Kill him with kindness. http://www.s10v8.com/images/smilies/icon_biggrin.gif

[Mike]

realize that he\'s a person with feelings just like you, he just happens to be your father. Don\'t give up on him. Do whatever you have to do to have a relationship with him. I have many friends that are a-holes and pricks, when they act that way, I come right back with it, but the friendship goes on.



Ask yourself, would you rather have a father that you fight with or no father at all?

[mango86]

The replies that have been givin to you by the members are great,I also have been without my parents since I was six. As Mike said, It\'s better to have a father than non at all. I\'m 49 and think about my parents daily. I have not seen my dad since I was 21, my mother since I was 16. Best advice I can give, is to listen to your Heart. Hope it works out for you.

[Fergusonic]

I wonder if your Father is crouchy due to divorce? That\'ll make a man turn into an animal. At least you see all this and you realize that you do not wanna be like that. It must be tough for you, hang in there....maybe someday your Father will read this thread and wake up to a new world.

[BrandOmatic]

If he works in a shop, that is probably a big aggravation. I know how aggravated i get working on stuff, and I know of a few people who own their own automotive repair businesses, and all i see is stress, aggravation, and a lot of times anger. Just maybe a reason... wish you the best.

[Fathead]

well, it didnt take long for him. He called me today, at about noon, and the conversation was he asked if i was still mad, i said yeah, its not somethign small this time, he said ok, and asked if i was goin camping, i said no, then i told him what i was mad about how he gets mad at little things, how he has a short temper, how i put soo much time money and effort into the truck but its still his, and stuff like that, and how i wanted to take what was mine, sell it, and get my OWN CAR. THen he responded with him apologizing for how he gets mad easily, he admitted that all this was his problem, and how whenever he gets mad at whateve rlittle thing, he takes it out on me. I told him i wanted to talk, but over the phone, even though its only like 2 min to his place(although i cant get there cause he has my truck, lol) i want to talk over the phone cause then when he gets pissed again which im almost positive he will, he doenst have to storm off, it will be easier. And, ive always gone camping with him, for a LONG time, and im not going this weekend, i want him to see what its like w/o me, see how bored he gets, see how he misses me, and give him time to think about it, there will also be some other parents there to talk to him about it. Well, just thought id let you know, and THANKS A BUNCH FOR ALL THE ADVICE, it really helps me think about things. ill keep you informed, and once again, thanks.

[mango86]

I\'m glad yall are at least talking, thats a big start.Things can only get better as long as you talk things out and understand that you both have feelings. Smile, it always feels better then a frown!